(get it? re-VAMP…vampires….it is Halloween tomorrow…no? just me? damn…)
So it has been a long, long time since I used my blog page.
Since I last posted, my mental health has been my main focus, and by that I mean my motivation to do anything but go to work has been pretty low. I have spent waaaaaaay too much time in bed scrolling through YouTube and not achieving very much.
I recently got back from visiting my parents in sunny Spain where I also celebrated my 26th birthday. I came to the conclusion that I didn’t want to spend the majority of the 26th year of my life in bed (well 27th year if you want to get technical), so to try and stop this from happening I have been spending a lot of my time pumping myself up to get my life back on track.
There are a few bits and pieces I want to change but motivation can be hard when a bout of anxiety and depression hits, and the black hole of hiding in my room with my computer and a takeaway happens. Though I have already taken steps to try and stop this from happening (therapy and medication), anxiety and depression are just part of my life, and I know I need to not be so hard on myself when they get in the way. Having a bit more love and compassion for myself is something I am trying to input into my daily life, and it is surprisingly quite hard. I have lost count of how many times I say something negative to myself, about myself, in just one single day. I am often told that the more we tell ourselves something, the more likely we are to believe it. So less calling myself lazy or stupid or crazy and more calling myself intelligent, hardworking and friendly is definitely on the agenda.
image: defying shadows – https://defyingshadows.com/2014/09/01/media-monday-16-comics-that-explain-depression/
My overall fitness is another thing I want to improve on. I started off the year trying to change this and it was going pretty well until I had a three month period of low mood, leading to a total lack of motivation (hence the staying in bed too much). This time to try and preemptively stop myself from changing my mind about going the gym in evenings, I’m going to get up earlier and go in the mornings instead. I find that I have more motivation on weekday mornings so I’m hoping changing my gym routine to match my motivation levels will help me stick to going. Exercise is one of the best things you can do to keep depression at bay so I’m hoping it will also help with my mood levels in general. We will have to wait and see!
Overall I am trying to create a more positive environment for myself. Though there are other aspects of my life that may also need some attention, I feel it is better
to pick one or two things to focus on at a time so I don’t become overwhelmed and more likely to give up. To hold myself a bit more accountable I will do updates via my instagram
(if you would like to follow me
you can @valkyrie27) and the odd blog post
about it. I don’t want my blog to focus completely on fitness as I use it to express what is on my mind at the time. I am hoping to add a new blog post every week to get the creative juices flowing again. If you have anything you would like me to write about let me know in the comments.
So that is my little update for now. I hope you like the changes I made to the page and I will chat to you again soon!